The Jaffa Cake Debate

It can't have escaped your notice that many authors in the Wordy Wednesday interviews choose the delicious orange Jaffa Cake as their favourite biscuit.

Since the day the Jaffa cake was invented (by good friends Mr Jaffa and Mr Cake) there has been debate as to whether they are biscuits or cakes. If only Mr Jaffa's cousin Reginald Biscuit had gone into partnership with him as first planned this would never have happened!*

There was even a court case about the small round and biscuit sized snack, which determnined that, for tax purposes they were tiny flat cakes, not biscuits. Decided by the simple fact that a cake becomes hard when stale while a biscuit becomes soft. Test it for yourself, leave a jaffa cake uneaten for a few days out on a dish in the kitchen (no I have never managed this test either - the tax office must be very strong willed).

But can we trust what the tax office says? After all, they said that Egyptian mummies were 'dried fish' for tax purposes, so there can be some debate as to their veracity.

So I asked the general public via the medium of Twitter, as we all know they are an intelligent lot. There was of course much squabbling as they are also an argumentative lot. But the final outcome was...

So please answer and RT this poll in readiness
Is a jaffa cake a biscuit? Also do you like them? #jaffacake

— Tattooed Mummy (@tattooed_mummy) June 8, 2016

and therefore there will be no more acceptance of Jaffa Cakes as the favourite biscuit of authors. Thank you.

@tattooed_mummy It's a biscuit dammit. You can dunk it in tea.

— Marion Grace Woolley (@AuthorMGW) June 8, 2016

No! No more!

@M_Hoosenhole @tattooed_mummy in all honesty I would be the one eating them while everyone else argued about it anyway

— Ice Queen (@opalfruits78) June 9, 2016

Ok there we are, we can eat them, we cannot call them biscuits.

Pop over and like my Facebook Page to join in a conversation about Jaffa Cakes, or some news story that catches my eye. Or Follow my meandering chatter on Twitter.

*This bit may be a blatant lie

Extra info about the law and why the debate matters : Under UK law no value added tax (VAT) is placed on biscuits or cakes. But critical to the controversial issue of Jaffa Cakes’ name, when a biscuit is covered in chocolate it becomes subject to the standard VAT rate, currently 20%.

Photo credit Copyright: shootdiem / 123RF Stock Photo

Wordy Wednesday with Laura Clay

Hello WordyWednesday fans! Today I'm introducing and quizzing Laura Clay.

Her book, an urban fantasy set in 1980s Edinburgh, is looking for an agent/publisher as we speak.So feel free to grab her and snap that up!

And now onto the questions, *turns on the bright light and aims it at Laura*

When did you start writing?
English was always one of my favourite subjects at school and it frustrated me that creative writing didn’t seem to be a large part of the curriculum. The first piece I clearly remember was for the Standard Grade exam, and because I’m an 80s child it involved an adventure based on Duran Duran’s Save A Prayer video. I passed with flying colours.
I properly started writing fiction in earnest back in autumn 2012 when I won a place on a creative writing course (thanks to Twitter, of all things!). After that I was persuaded to take part in the annual National Novel Writing Month, where you’re challenged to write a 50,000 word novel in November. It’s all just sort of snowballed since then, and I’ve won NaNoWriMo three times now.

What 3 things (not including paper, computer, pens) would you like to facilitate a good day’s writing?
I can’t survive without music. It’s tied into a lot of what I write, so I keep big playlists of 80s synthpop, New Wave and punk. Caffeine’s also a must (or something more alcoholic in the evenings). And encouragement always helps, whether that’s from my long-suffering husband or virtually on Twitter and Facebook.

Do you write to a schedule, eg every day or three times a week, set times, etc or do you write as and when the mood strikes?
I try to write a little every day, aiming for 500-1000 words, but I always carry a notebook with me since the Muse can pop up and throw ideas at me anywhere! The word count target in Scrivener is really useful for motivation- the bar turns from red to green the more words you write.

Laura thinking about biscuits - the tricky question

What are your favourite biscuits?
It’s a toss-up between a crumbly Viennese finger and a dark chocolate Digestive.

Tea or Coffee?

Coffee, generally. Instant, too, because I’m too impatient to get the decent ground coffee out.

Is writing your main source of income? I read lots of articles saying writers make no money, and my readers asked this question a lot! Can you survive on book writing alone? If not, what else do you do?

Sadly not. The pieces I’ve had success with didn’t pay, but on the other hand they’ve been good for getting my name out there. In my day job I’m a freelance proofreader and copy editor, currently I work with Raspberry Pi making awesome online resources for children (and adults) to learn how to do cool things with a tiny, cheap computer. I’m also subeditor of the official magazine, The MagPi.

Where do you do most of your writing?

I work from home so it’s usually my office, crammed full of books and musical instruments, or sometimes the conservatory where the birds keep me company. But Edinburgh is full of great bars, coffee shops and historic castles, so I sometimes take my tablet out with me. I once wrote a short story in the sunny grounds of Crichton Castle, a short drive from home- it was very relaxing.

What book are you reading at the moment?

I have a few on the go at once. Since my novel is Young Adult I read quite a few novels in that age range, so currently I’m working through Scorpia Rising by Anthony Horowitz (a well researched, fast-paced teenage spy adventure), Remix by Non Pratt (painfully realistic account of love and friendship at a music festival) and Panther by David Owen (a moving story about a depressed boy and well worth tracking down).

Do you use social media (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc) to engage with your audience? Do you think it helps sales and do you find it fun or a chore?

I’m on Twitter all the time, and it does help with getting more views to my blog. It’s also fantastic for finding fellow writers, editors, agents and so on. There’s regular virtual meet ups, like #ukyachat for anyone interested in YA books and #wwwblogs run by the Women Writers, Women’s Books site. I’ve found some awesome people on these hashtags.

Do you own an e-reader? And do you prefer to read digital or paper copy?
I’ve got the Kindle app on a few devices- it’s handy for scooping up 99p bargains and taking on holiday. I still prefer paper books though. Edinburgh’s stuffed full of bookshops, and I go to my local library every week. It’s a UNESCO City of Literature and judging by my groaning bookshelves it definitely lives up to the hype!

If you could genetically cross an animal with a fruit or vegetable what would you choose and why? I'm currently thinking Horse Radish...impossible to ride, but feisty...

Hmm... I could have an animal from Celtic mythology, because several of my novel characters happen to be those sort of creatures. Maybe a citrusy selkie... a seal-lime?

If reading and writing were banned, what would you do instead?

Oh crumbs... I’d play piano and bass guitar all day, though I’d have to play by ear if I wasn’t allowed sheet music to read. Or I’d dive into my pile of retro games consoles, always a good way to pass the time.

If you could bring a dead person back from the dead for one day to have tea and a natter with them, who would you choose and why?

Tricky! It’d probably be someone from the 80s. Maybe Bob Holness from Blockbusters. I bet he has a few stories about what the teenagers were really like when the cameras weren’t running.

If you could pass one law what would it be?

I’d ban achingly trendy hipster bars, like that cereal one in London. It wouldn’t surprise me if that sort of thing’s already popped up in Edinburgh for the Fringe. We have enough red-trousered flat-capped folk in the New Town as it is!


Huge thanks to Laura for putting up with my silly questions.

Laura's most recent published work was part of a collaborative effort at the NineWorlds convention to write a novel in 75 minutes. The result was a novella, The Phantom of the Space Opera, she wrote chapter 14. It can be downloaded here: https://nineworlds.co.uk/


Her short story, A Story of Homecoming, is available in a free ebook from the Scottish Book Trust and can be downloaded from http://scottishbooktrust.com/
 

Laura also has a short piece, Diablada, which will be exhibited as part of the 26 Children’s Winters project at the Museum of Childhood in Edinburgh from October- it will also be online as an advent calendar in December and published at a later date. Details are at http://www.edinburghmuseums.org.uk/
And check out her blog where there is short fiction and other rambling at https://writingsfromotherworld.wordpress.com/

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The day I stole my daughters Ed Balls fame

So on Ed Balls Day in 2013 my daughter made a cake.

I guess Ed Balls day was still fairly new, no one got excited. We ate the cake. The world moved on.

This year on 28th April I tweeted

Cake for breakfast! After all...it's Ed Balls day! Have a good one! #EdBalls #EdBallsDay pic.twitter.com/K325rdkKWO

— Tattooed_Mummy (@tattooed_mummy) April 28, 2015

and thought not much more about it, it still tickled me that we had made an Ed Balls cake but otherwise...well that was it.

And then, someone rounding up witty Ed Balls themed tweets shared it on a list. Then The Guardian mentioned the tweet. Then Mashable shared the tweet, and Buzzfeed shared the tweet, then The Metro picked up on it. Finally it appeared on the BBC News website.

My daughter was livid. I had foolishly (because I hadn't been thinking) failed to mention her or mention that it was 'her cake'. I was 'famous' for five minutes, my daughter was not.

She is proud of her cake, and furious at me. Here, have some cake.

How to choose a new book or a new author

After reading a comment on facebook I was put into a thoughtful mood about how I (and maybe other people) choose a new author to read. I realise we are all different, so I’m really writing about me and what I find, I’d love you to comment if you agree or not though! I am happy to hear other ideas.

I don’t usually go for hyped books, big posters tend to make me shy away, grand advertising campaigns and movie tie ins usually (though not always) turn me off of a book. I don’t read any news papers so review pages there don’t even get a look in.

But I often buy books, I love to read real paper so while I do have a Kobo reader and have various reading apps on my iPad and Android devices, paper wins for me. I like to have signed books too – and you can’t sign a Kobo.

So with that in mind I prefer to browse a book store or a library than the digital world, and I often judge a book by its cover! I found the fabulous Elizabeth is Missing in just such a way, but the reason I was in the book shop at all was because a friend on twitter had suggested I read a specific book.

Finding books for me is based on a few things and while I love to browse a book shop I think I find more ideas via social media than anywhere else. I use Goodreads, a really useful site where people share their thoughts on books (although you do have to watch for spoilers – some people seem clueless in how to write a review without revealing vital plot points! I could write a whole other post on that subject I think) I also use Amazon reviews, where again spoilers can be an issue, coupled with people that use the review section to complain about their delivery driver.

The main issue with these sites is that while they do offer a few ideas they don’t really sell a book to you and so you just see book after book of the sort you already read. To find a really new book or author I prefer twitter. I love to find an author and follow them there, find insights into their daily life and the book writing process, to see a book gradually created and then finally the day of publication.

I will often buy books based on what can only be described as a ‘buy my book’ tweet. Not the awful automated Direct Messages that fakely welcome you for a follow and by the way BUY MY BOOK, but the more friendly and personal sort of tweet that says something like, “I’m so excited, I’m finally a published author I can’t wait for you to read ….” Or “If you like stories about ……. And …… then I think you’d love my book ….” Etc and of course the offer of free books or signed books is great too.

Because the thing about social media is that it’s …well, sociable. An author that chats to his or her fans and new followers alike can rapidly find a group of friendly people not only willing to read a new book, but to actively promote it on social media too, often for free. No one forces you to follow anyone on twitter so an author’s followers are people that are already keen, an almost captive market! And an author that can engage, be witty, be friendly, AND promote their book will have eager buyers and equally important will have people keen to retweet and share.

On twitter I follow several publishers and book sellers that offer regular competitions but also information on new authors. I use Facebook too, but am less active there as it seems more cluttered with games and adverts and weird videos.

So I think the way I really find new books is by suggestions and recommendations on social media (blog links to reviews are my favourite) and by authors who converse with their readers on social media, and by covers that grab my attention when I go down to the book shop to get the books that have been suggested!

Of course we all have favourite authors and buying their new book is a given, but how do you choose new books, new authors?

And authors, does it work? Do you find social media drives sales? Or is it just me?

Stuck for ideas on what to read next? My brother has just published a book...just saying

Petition or Pitchfork?

Online is a funny old world. Social media can often be the fastest 'news' source around and most days I am guilty of checking it before the more standard news sources. We all know by now (I hope) that just because a story is in the paper, in print, it doesn't necessarily follow that it's true. And most of us are aware that fiction can be slewed to fact and vice versa, but oddly we seem happy to trust 'real people', those faceless strangers we meet online.

Twitter is a great place and I really enjoy talking to people there. I'm opinionated (no really!) and so are many people I follow. Opinions are great but some days it seems we forget that opinions are not fact. A huge group of people seem to find that with the advent of 'instant news' via social media, that their opinion, and the facts of a matter can be just as instantly determined.

Wait for all the facts? Don't be silly, I have seen what twitter said and so now I know! In fact there was an article in the Sun/Guardian/Times/Mirror and they agree so it must be true. And  now I am sure that xxxxx is guilty. And that xxxxx is innocent and so next I shall ask, nay demand! that everyone agree with me and grab pitchforks to attack the guilty and sign a petition to protect the innocent!

This was aptly shown his week with the Jeremy Clarkson 'fracas' affair. Currently the BBC, his employer, are looking into the facts. Yet over 300,000 are so sure of his innocence that they have signed a petition while equal numbers malign him and demand his sacking. 

I wasn't there, I know this may shock you, but I don't know the details of what happened. So I will wait and see.

Petitions and pitchforks are a simple analogy for this failure to stop and think. Both have proper useful functions but either, grabbed in haste, make you look foolish when all the facts are revealed. I'd like to think that even in an instant age of fast moving social media we can still use our brains, can still stop and think before we act.

Christopher Jefferies is a man who experienced pitchforks, fuelled by media and misinformation, let us not forget him, let us not be too hasty to be sure that we are right, let us gather facts and make decisions based on them.

Instant social media interaction is fantastic fun. But it should not replace courts and juries, nor a bit of thoughtful common sense. A tweet is just a tweet, it can be a fact or not, I'm not saying you should never act on a tweet, I'm saying you need to use some thought, check, check other sources, don't grab the proverbial pitchfork or sign anything until you are sure, and even then ask yourself is this the best course of action? Don't fall into the 'outrage trap' that can blur a true view of things in its red mist.

The one thing that social media can be great for is asking, asking the questions, keeping a story in the public eye. Never feel you need to keep silent about an important issue. Shouting at those in power, demanding answers can be a vital role of the general public, we have power in our numbers.  Do you have all the facts? If you don't have all the facts, demand them.

But put down your pitchfork, close that online petition page, think about why you have decided your course of action.

Art by DD and me ...she did the angel and devil

Feeling Extra Sociable

It seems that through a clerical error ... due to my skill ...because everyone loves me ... for some reason I have been shortlisted for a Blogging award with Britmums.

I have been selected in the category 'Social Media' which includes social media as an adjunct to blogging. Y'know, Twitter, Pinterest and that. I think I talk too much.


Hilariously the category is sponsored by Pinterest. And those that follow me there will be aware that my Pinterest is ...a little odd shall we say.

Anyway, if you like this blog, or love my weird Pins, or like a natter on twitter do consider voting for me. I'd love to add 'Award Winning' to the front of 'Blogger' when I brag about what I get up to in the evenings.









Oh and pop over and check out my Pinterest Boards *nudge nudge*

There are some great blogs shortlisted, and as long as they are not in my category *wink* feel free to vote for lots of them!

Let there be cheese, but let it not be grated in advance....

Mummy Bloggers

I hate the term 'mummy blogger' (I may have mentioned this, at length, before) I hate the whole image, some woman who is 'just a mum' (don't get me started) who sits around reading Woman's Own, listening to Woman's Hour and eating chocolate while her husband earns all the cash and then sometimes she writes a review of some nappy sacks.

Now I KNOW that is not what all you lovely mummy bloggers are actually like, I know because whether I like it or not I am one of you (also I've met a few of you and without a shadow of a doubt all ace!). I'm a mummy (clue's in the name) and I blog (clue's in what you are reading), ipso facto I'm a mummy blogger. And |I'm none of the above. I work full time (blogging in lunch breaks and evenings) I rant about politics, gender issues and food. I hate Woman's Hour (though I've I've actually been on it) and I have a SAHD for a husband who does all the house-y stuff.

And then I thought, what if I WAS that sort of person though, what if I was 'just a mum' (I know I know - I told you don't get me started) if I was a mum that blogged about being pregnant, varicose veins, pelvic floor weakness and vomit. What if my reviews were of changing bags and nappies and I ranted about public toilets (or lack of them) and baby changing facilities, would it be so bad if I was that woman? and you know what, it wouldn't be bad at all! If written well that sort of stuff is BLOODY AWESOME because being a mummy is BLOODY AWESOME and if you can share the ups and downs in a moving and yet still hilarious way then a blog like that would be gold dust, gold dust I tell you!!!

And so I present to you my new favourite blog, a blog by a mummy, about being a mummy, and it's BLOODY AWESOME! so I have finally, after far too long probably, embraced the mummy blogger (metaphorically - it would be a tad stalkerish otherwise) I'm proud to be amongst this illustrious group of super humans. Go, Read one of the funniest yet gentlest blogs I've read in donkeys' years.

I give you The Confinement Chronicles, my favourite post is ...nope can't decide they are all hilarious, have enjoyed the frankly adorable post on being pregnant far too long, and laughed like a drain (appropriately) at the take on the bladder of a pregnant person.

Go ahead and check her out, But do come back, I'll miss you

And look, she's only on Twitter too! follow! follow!

It's a funny old world

I like the internet. It makes the world a small place. Like an intimate soiree. And like a party you chat, you listen, you get talked into things....

So when a Twitter buddy sent me a link to an online competition saying 'this would be great for you' I had to take a look. How flattering! It was a competition to be the Citizen Journalist for Ecover (a company I love and use and have reviewed on the blog in the past) and part of the deal was you had to attend a festival. We all know I'm a sucker for being drunk in a tent in field so how could I refuse!

I entered. I panicked a bit that I didn't write much (about 140 characters per answer I expect!) Then I imagined that was the last I'd hear of that.

But I only went and won! So I'm now on a roller coaster ride to discover Ecover's 'Secret Thing' and to write articles for their online news magazine The Splash., To attend Hampton Court Flower Show (will I need a hat?) and then of course the festival.....

 Yes gentle reader this middle aged self proclaimed hippy is only off to Glastonbury this year in the company of Junior reporter DD! - who knows what adventures will befall us! Stay tuned!

I won't be alone as I cannot be trusted there were two winners. So I'll take a moment to introduce you to .... Lemon!

A Week In Tweets

Thanks to Slummy Single Mummy for the idea, and to Very Bored in Catalunya for reminding me about it!

Here is my week in (7 or so) tweets (and yes I know it's the wrong day - rules are meant for breaking)

Saturday 7th April

Haha all the beard talk last night. I had the funnest dream. I was reading a book about "dating for bearded men" on a train when...

..a guy got on and sat behind me and started to shave his chest hair with an electric razor...lol

Sunday 8th April

You know when you buy curry on Saturday night but you only eat half.....STUFFED WITH LEFT OVER CURRY NOW! (I won't comment on what time of day this tweet was written)

Monday 9th April

I'm a bit bored. I might take some pictures and share them on instagram. Not tweet them though. Just pictures of my house..

Tuesday 10th April

I do love sock monkeys, I would like to try and make one . I wonder who invented the sock monkey? #socks

Wednesday 11th April

I just used the word Tallywhacker in a conversation with a work colleague

Thursday 12th April

I need to book at @DernwoodFarm or my bro will kill me (still haven't done it - now waiting on work to confirm the time off I can have)

and

My favourite festival @CampBestival is following me! *does hippy joy dance*

Friday 13th April

oh yay! I'm talking #mooncup again! (we should have a mooncup twitter party with a free mooncup on offer @mooncupltd )

So there you have it - anyone reading this who has never ventured onto twitter can now confirm that we do indeed talk about a whole lot of random useless crap

But anyone that is already there will know that the conversations these tweets sparked or related to, were fantastic! Are you on Twitter? Why not come and play.

Long, long ago...

well ok, September actually,

I had a plan for a Handmade Christmas Decoration swap. I didn't know how much interest it would get as I'm not a very prolific blogger (haha!) and although I have lots of friends on Twitter, one can never be sure anyone is really paying any attention, so it was a nice surprise when my 'limit' of 20 people was reached!

The range of decorations was fabulous, from simple ideas that we could all have a go at to eleborate artistic ventures, and all were really Christmassy, made with love and generally wonderful.

Lazily I haven't got around to posting the pictures of these gems, so now is the time.

Behold the glory of the Handmade Christmas Decoration swap!

with many thanks to the twitter users who played

@beckycheeks
@frugalfamily
@Lady_Gyr
@mamacrow
@mummylion
@redtedart
@missielizzieb
@peekaywrites
@rea_g
@MotherScuffer
@snafflesmummy
@chickenruby
@cherrytweep
@smokerette
@liveotherwise
@WahooCoo

@smiffysmrs

@Georgina_Giles

(You'll see I am missing some pictures - watch this space - I'm hoping to have more up soon)

The one where I rant a bit about reviews

This post is sure to mean I am never approached by a company to review a product ever again. But that is not my intention.

I opened my Google Reader to read 11 new posts yesterday and they were all reviews. All of them, every one. 

And that made me think. 

I do not follow any review blogs or company blogs, I follow (vomits at use of phrase) mummy bloggers, and a few daddy bloggers and a few other personal blogs. I read them for the chit chat, the anecdotes, the mundanities of life that oddly seem either comforting or hilarious when put into a blog. If I want a review I go to amazon, or a review site, or I google it. Now before you all shout, yes I know, I have reviewed things here. I reviewed some Nakd bars (they were yum) and a mysterious magical toothbrush (it was amazingly effective) , I reviewed Vosene (more than once) and I reviewed a Nokia Smart Phone. So I am not immune to the lure of the 'freebie' and lets be honest, who doesn't like something for nothing!?!

But I at least try to be honest and I know it's hard to look a gift horse in the mouth; of course this means reviews of freebies tend to be good, many are glowing, does this convince me they are great products? not really? so is the advert (for gentle reader, that is what these reviews are) really even working?

I will post here and on twitter if I find something I love, whether I'm asked to or not, whether I am sent a freebie or not. And I will accept things to try, and then review them if they are something I would normally use or try and I will be honest.

I think the main thing about adverts is, that like the television, they need to be short, and spaced between quality programs because if not, the blog just turns into one long ad break, and I for one find the urge to fast forward....

Maybe this is not a popular view? maybe you love to find new things via a review on a friends blog? Do you blog reviews? Do you set yourself limits?  Do comment below and let me know.

Thanks for reading...normal service will resume after this message from our sponsor......

I'm a Twitterholic - don't judge me

When did you join twitter? (You can find the exact date at bwitterday.com)
I had an account for 6 months or so, which I deleted when hubby said I was addicted. He told me to create a new one when I was so grumpy without twitter! This account was started September 22, 2009

Why did you join twitter?
I didn't want to, it sounded awful and I loved facebook (which I have now deleted! oh fickle online person I am) but Stephen Fry seemed to rate it so I joined to see what it was like.

Who is/was your oldest follower? Who did you follow first? Tell me all about them. (firstfivefollowers.com will give you this info)

The First person I followed was Stephen Fry

My first 5 followers on the new account (so they must have missed me!) were: @saraheadworth @StoatsJackson @ti_bo @LivingWithCMT @JasonBradbury.

Stoats is a lovely cuddly funny guy well worth a follow :-) I have a crush on Jason Bradbury, Ti_bo is a cutie of the nefarious type, the CMT account is a hereditary condition I have too, we share symptoms :-) Sarah is a nice relatively normal person haha

Do you have any celebrities following you or have you ever had a DM from a celeb?

not DMs but lots of @replies (depending on your idea of celebrity I guess!) I've had tweets from Graham Lineham, Alexsander(The Meerkat) , Paul Daniels,  Stephen Fry, Chris Moyles, and I chat fairly regularly with  Jason Bradbury, Andy Stanton, Matt Kirshen I tend to star them, so check my favourites.

If you could follow anyone who is not on Twitter – alive or dead, real or fictional – on Twitter, who would it be?

would be good to follow a blog of someone really real but also who is secretive in real life or who no one knows much about, God would be great though! But I bet he'd tweet fast

Which came first Twitter or the Blog?

The blog. No readers, but the blog.

How old is too old? (or 'sniff it and see')

Every now and again on social media someone says they have chucked away a yoghurt 3 days past the 'use by' date, or asks if bread 2 days past the sell by date is OK to eat or........well you get the idea. They want to know if they can safely consume an item of food that seems to be saying  

NO! DON'T EAT ME, YESTERDAY I WAS FINE 

BUT TODAY I AM FILLED WITH POISONOUS BACTERIA 

THAT WILL KILL YOU IN AN INSTANT 

WITH PAIN YOU CAN ONLY IMAGINE 

or something like that anyway.

I am old enough to know that expiry dates are a fairly new invention. Yes young people you read that right, we have not always been told when food is 'past it's best'. For hundreds, indeed thousands of years we used our own judgement! We looked at things, smelled them, touched them and decided 'is it still good'? (* when I say 'we' I do not, obviously, mean me! I mean the human race, I'm not thousands of years old, or hundreds come to that!)

And in some cases we still do. While supermarkets may wrap your vegetables in a plastic bag with a sticker proclaiming 'use by 9 Feb 2010' your local green grocer is unlikely to do the same, my local green grocer sells cucumbers, they are long and firm and green and that's it! I have to fondle the cucumber and decide how fresh it is! Is it soft? getting limp? then I'll ask if it's discounted or buy a firmer one! (are you all right? some of you appear a little flushed?)

Likewise my butcher does not put 'use by' dates on his pork products, i have to admire his loins and decide if they are fresh, are they greenish in hue? Do they smell? If not, I'm happy, a pink fresh loin is most women's dream, as are his sausages and his faggots! but I digress.

Until 1973 no stores in the UK used best before dates at all! And it was Marks and Spencer that began the trend purely as a marketing technique, to show how 'fresh' their food was! Of course all other food sellers leapt on to the bandwagon to be sure and keep up with the new trend.

It's true that some foods nowadays are hard to see. How can I tell if a tin of beans is 'fresh' or if a carton of orange juice is? and the simple answer is of course that I can't, like the rest of society I rely to some degree on labelling of the packets, but wouldn't it be easier to tell me when it was packed rather than a use by date? When I bake a cake I estimate how long it will last (bad example - 10 minutes in my house) by the date it was baked and then I use judgement.

When I open a loaf of bread and it had a patch of mould on it, I tear off the blue bit and toast the bread! I only throw away the whole loaf if it's more mould than loaf or if the flavour is totally tainted. Marmite can disguise a multitude of tastes.

And yoghurt is gone off milk! As is cheese, it can't go off! Sniff it! how does it smell? I've often eaten yoghurts 2 weeks past their 'use by' dates with no ill effects at all. And cheese can usually just have the mould cut off - after all cheddar is often already 24 months old by the time you buy it! So why would another month make any difference?

But I'm not alone, I am aware that many of you eat food that you have judged to be OK. Just remember it's a skill, learn it, pass it on, don't be afraid, trust your instincts.  My good friend Donna on Twitter sent me this handy link to get you started.

And don't come crying back here if you get sick.


Remember that this advice is just from a boring old person, not anyone clever and don't take risks with the elderly, the very young or the infirm. (No testing mouldy yoghurt out on your granny!)

PS   A website called Love Food Hate Waste perpetuates the myth by saying NEVER eat food past the use by date, which is just silly IMO. They even tell you 'if it looks fine, still throw it away!  I still say that for cheese and many other products this is ridiculous.


If you would like to buy some out of date food to practice on - look here for some cheap deals. Yes indeedy, an online retailer that specialises in old food!

A week is a long time in......

well in time really. last week I was verging on the obsessive where Twitter was concerned. So after the weekend I thought I'd try cold turkey..... you know what... I like it! even with out the cranberry sauce!

I miss a few of my twitter friends (but then again, too few to mention.... as the song cruelly goes - (and you know who you are!) so I'm closing my twitter account! hooray...watch this space as I get my life back..........

and if you miss me - email me or leave a comment here.

twugs (as they say)