New Year and some New Ideas

A new year makes a lot of people take stock of their life, they look at changing things and starting new things that they hope will improve their lot. I'm no different! and so far this year I've been doing the following things...I'm sharing them here so that I can remember and so that you might get a few ideas too - and of course, as always, do add any comments or ideas I've missed.

I have not joined a gym. Or pledged to run a marathon, or given myself a target of walking more. However, Fizz says I should remember that even when it's raining she likes to take, at the very least, a stroll around the block.

What have I done? 

Online stuff.

Well first I did a quick email tidy up. I looked at all of the emails waiting to be read and shuddered! I use Gmail and have set up lots of rules and filters to sort my mail but there is still a lot of it. So i looked first at the business emails I receive. Lots of companies sign you up for 'information about our offers' type emails when you buy from them or when you open an online account, so the first thing I did was to unsubscribe from all of those.
Then I looked at my filters and checked they were all still relevant, I deleted a few that had been set up for specific events that had now passed, and created a few new ones for 2018. With my inbox tidied, I moved on to Twitter and checked which apps and companies have access to my twitter, lots are necessary of course, the apps I use on my iPad and the news sites that allow sharing, Klout and a few others, but I deleted any I hadn't used in a while and then deleted all those I didn't recognise.
Having long been a fan of not listening/looking at nasty things I also checked I was still signed up to BlockTogether and that they still had the access they needed (by signing up there I have over 51000 people blocked on twitter - most are on the 'nazi' list - (message me on twitter if you'd like to know more) Twitter is a much nicer place since I started using BlockTogether.
I also checked that all the sites that could have 2 factor authorisation (2FA) set up, did have. security of online life has become as important as keeping your home safe, with more identity theft and online fraud, so if a site offers extra protection, I take it! I also renewed my yearly subscription to LastPass password manager. I have over 50 different passwords and using a password manager I can be sure they are all different, long, complicated and hard to crack!

Next I looked at some money saving;

not least because I need to find the money to connect to the Playstation 4 network so that I can go (virtual) fishing with my brother at the weekends. The PS4 network carries an annual charge of £49.99 so that was my target.
It was remarkably easy to hit because it seems that I've gradually (lazily) been hemorrhaging money!
First I bought some coffee bags so that I can make my own coffee at work. I have to have real coffee and a cafetiere is just too much mess but using coffee bags instead of a £1.70 a day coffee from the canteen I can save £5.50 a week!
Also by buying ready meals instead of using the canteen I can still have a hot meal (microwaved) but save £2 a day, so there's another £10 a week.
Much as I love Audible and audiobooks my £7.99 a month habit is pricey, so as a trial I've cancelled that. I intend to relisten to the 40 or so books I have bought from them over the years and then to look at using the library's free audiobook service. So there is a huge £96 a year saving too!
With just those few changes I have saved an amazing £822 a year! more than enough for my PS4 bill.

What have you been up to? Any savings this year or changes to your life that don't include exercise or diet (those are so old hat now surely? haha)

Car safety, things I pack to avoid catastrophe

Recently a blogging friend Sara-Jayne over "Keep up with the Jones Family" at had a terrible experience with her car. After a breakdown, late in the evening, on a busy motorway with no safe place for her to get away from traffic she found herself faced with a wait for the AA.

Due to the nature of the breakdown the lights on her car failed and she was left waiting in the increasingly dark night in a really dangerous location.

The AA did not arrive for hours and during that time she was understandably distressed.(Read more on her twitter here)

Her experience made me reassess my own car safety procedures.

I carry a spare tyre, (not all cars come with one so it's worth checking!) and I know where my spare tyre is, and I check it is roadworthy at each MOT and service - that's important as newer cars do not need an MOT so it can escape being checked for several years.

I regularly check tyre pressures. If you've not done this it's a great idea to find out how to on a day you are not in a hurry and don't have an obviously soft tyre.

I make sure my screen wash is topped up - a seagull once crapped all over the windscreen, and it took a lot of water to clear it enough to see! (and don't ask me about the fox blood and guts incident)

I know where the dipstick is (jokes about him being a SAHD can be inserted here) and I can check the oil, and know where to add more too.

I have always carried a first aid kit and a 'life hammer' (the thing that can break car windows and slice through seat belts to release people in an emergency)

And after reading about Sara-Jayne and her horrible experience I'm investing in some hi-vis vests to keep in the boot of the car, in case we need to get out an walk anywhere if the car breaks down.

And also a warning triangle (they are essential when travelling in Europe anyway, and a great idea to give advanced warning if you have to stop the car unexpectedly)

I am even tempted to get a battery operated hazard light after thinking about electrical failures meaning the car lights could fail at night!

What do you carry in case of emergency? Have I missed anything? Or am I over prepared? What do you think?

Are you a safe driver?

Do we all drive safely?

I was send a cardboard VR headset which accommodates a phone, (I have android, it works fine, also works on Apple)  to test out the new Driving Academy game from Goodyear Tyres.

The idea of the Driving Academy game is to demonstrate to teens and children how easy it is to be distracted while driving and how a distraction can cause a mistake and just how quickly it can all go wrong.


The game can be played without the VR headset - so even if you don't have one, pop over to GoodYear with your phone or tablet and try your luck. The VR headset gives you the thrill of 3d of course.

So far I admit I'm not the best driver when playing the game, the phone ringing makes me swerve off of the road! But that's a reason I switch off my phone when I'm really driving - or have it in my bag on silent, so I can get messages when I stop.

Is the game like real driving? No. But it's a good way to introduce driving skills to kids. And the VR headsets (which can be bought in various places, or made if you are crafty!) add some realism.

Thanks to Goodyear for sending me the headset to try out the game.

The Driving Academy App 

In 2016, and as part of the Driving Academy programme, Goodyear launched their first VR (virtual reality) app to connect with young drivers and make them aware of the dangers of driver distraction.

The  app, which uses Google Cardboard, aims to educate young people of the dangers of driver distractions through an immersive experience which puts them in the driving seat, and is used as part of the annual Young Driver Challenge competition run by Young Driver as well as promoted by the DIA through their extensive network of learner drivers.

Developed in conjunction with the Driving Instructors Association (DIA), the game tasks the player to drive through various scenarios whilst navigating internal distractions, such as text messages appearing, or passengers talking, and external distractions, such as pedestrians crossing the road. The free app is available for public use on  (available in Google Cardboard and non-VR formats) and is also used at Young Driver centres across the country as part of our Goodyear Driving Academy programme.

To find out more visit the Goodyear website here.

Halloween - Safe and Spooky

Just a reminder that Halloween is now more of a children's day of dress up fun more than anything else. I love dressing up for any excuse (as you know) and I've always encouraged DD to join in

Here we are some years ago on Halloween on our way to a party.

With more and more cheap costumes appearing on the market it's easy to assume all are safe. Check before you wear! Fire is a bigger risk than ever at Halloween not just due to trailing mummy bandages and wispy fairy wings, but all those pumpkins with candles in too!

Why not opt for either LED lights in your pumpkins and decorations or glowsticks to remove some risk. And check your costume is fire safe too.

Find more information here http://www.escapade.co.uk/halloween-fire-safety-guide.asp

Have a Happy Halloween.

Escapade – LED Candle Initiative
Having been in the fancy dress business for over 34 years, and as an authorised retailer of some of the largest brands in the world, all Escapade products conform to European safety standards.
Candles are one of the biggest causes of fires in the home - the London Fire Brigade attends around 20 fires a month caused by candles, incense and oil burners. Therefore, safety must come first and be the highest priority this Halloweens season.

“Unlike any other event throughout the year, during Halloween it is traditional to use candles in Jack-O-Lanterns around the door. As part of our fire awareness training we learn that there are three elements to make a fire: oxygen; fuel; and a heat source. We all need to breathe and wear clothing (be it fancy dress costume or a school uniform), but with the use of LED lights we can eliminate the heat source, making it impossible for fire to exist. Halloween should be scary for the right reason; together let’s make it safer for everyone”
- Bhupendra Maisuria, Director at Escapade

  Escapade Pumpkin lights are currently on spooky sale at £1.99 (updated for 2017)

Online Chemist - Direct to you - a review

I work full time. I squeeze in blogging in lunch breaks and after work. I have a teen so I'm a mummy taxi sometimes too, especially at weekends. And while this menas that (retired) Mr TM gets the joy of most of the big foodshops (lucky him!) it means that shopping for me is a bit of a chore. Finding time to get stuff on the way home from work, limited to where ever is open, no time to browse...

So it was nice to be asked by Chemist Direct to check out their online Chemist Shop. They offered me a voucher code for  a discount in exchange for this review, so here it is.

The first thing I checked was whether the website was registered with the Pharmaceutical society. It's a way to ensure that you are buying medicines safely and legally. I'm pleased to say that Chemist Direct is registered and proudly display the logo and registration number on their homepage.

The site was easy to search and had lots of clear pictures of the products on offer, they have sale sections with all sorts of offers. And then the site is split into catergories such as Pet, Beauty, Mother and Baby, Vitamins, Healthcare etc and they even have an online Doctor. An online Chemist is not only convinient it means that you don't have to sit and chat face to face about an embarrassing problem!

I spent a good hour browsing the cosmetics and the perfumes, looking at the great value branded products and the electricls too (yes there is a sexual health section, they they sell sex toys, no I didn't buy any)

I chose some nail polish for DD (remember how keen she is on nails?) and some lovely aftershave balm from Crabtree and Evelyn for Mr TM and then some lip gloss and powder for myself...lipstick, powder and paint, is she is or is she ain't? well yes I am!

Delivery is free on orders over £30 and they often have fabulous clearance bargains with up to 70% off recommended prices so your money goes further, great for gift buying or as a treat.

I like the fact that you can shop 24 hours a day, the site is easy to use, and they accept payment via Paypal as well as the usual card payments.

The products are great value, there are some real bargains and bulk buys available too to save even more.

They arrived promptly and well packaged. Today I'm rocking some L'Oreal 6 hour glossy lip gloss (in Golden Tattoo colour naturally!) and DD is looking forward to some Bubblegum Pink 'Model's Own'  nails.

Why not start your first shop with £5 off using this link

Beautiful Balloon Release...

Listening to Radio 4 about seabirds and plastic reminded me of this so I'm updating and re-posting.

Balloons are lovely aren't they. All shiny and floaty. Either being played with by children at a party or floating off into the wild blue after a wedding. Balloons are used for competitions too, whose will travel the farthest? And for sending prayers, or for memorials.  

Like everyone else I think the sight of hundreds of balloons soaring up into a blue sky is a beautiful thing, trailing tags with notes of love to heaven, what a gorgeous idea...

but balloons come down, and when they do they kill things, lots of things.

They fall into rivers, get snarled in trees, drift to the sea, and wildlife gets caught up or eats the burst 'skins' of the balloons (particularly turtles that naturally eat jellyfish drifting in the sea)

Click here to see the (distressing) photo gallery of balloon damage.

You wouldn't organise a mass litter. Please don't organise a balloon release.(Ditto 'sky lanterns')  Maybe you need more convincing, if so here are some links. I'd appreciate it if you spread the word.

 

Marine Conservation Society

Balloons Blow

But just telling people not to do something can be quite unhelpful, so I searched around for some celebration ideas. Here are some other things you could do that would not harm our planet.

I especially like this idea 

"Floating flowers- For a lot of people, the gently upward drifting of balloons gives them a sense of letting go, and at the same time thinking the balloon will eventually reach their loved one. Because remembering a loved one by potentially killing another life isn’t exactly the best feeling, there are many alternatives. Floating flowers or flower petals down a calm stream can give you the same sense of letting go. You will be able to be in nature and feel the energy of your loved one and all the life that surrounds you! Be sure to use non-poisonous flowers and not to let go an excessive amount."

We only have one chance, let's not screw it up - I want a beautiful planet for future generations. I hope you do too.

All Pictures Above Copyright (c) 123RF Stock Photos

Members of Parliament and their members. A Rant about Cock Pictures

So a Minister has sent a picture of his todger to a journalist who he believed to be a young female researcher. He is married with 5 children.

Is he sleazy? Yes. Was he wrong to do it? morally wrong? yes. Was he stupid to send a digital copy of his cock over t'interwebs to a woman? yes

Twitter seem to agree, among the humour and cock pictures are some angry tweets about his stupidity and lack of morals.

Already got someone on radio saying about Brooks Newmark it's time to 'draw a line under it'. I say add a moustache and a smiley face too
— P* (@98Apples) September 27, 2014

Pathetically naive and disgusting behaviour with ZERO respect for wife and kids #brooksnewmark
— Dominic Farrell (@DominicFarrell) September 27, 2014

And at first I agreed, after all what sort of creep, married with 5 kids sends pics of his shlong to young women online? but then I had a rethink, what if the MP was a young woman and the journalist had posed as a man? What if the entrapment was the other way round. And again I wasn't alone, lots of people though the entrapment was the disgusting part. That the newspaper and the journalist were to blame, after all, being sleazy is not a crime, betraying your wife, while pretty vile, is a person's own business.

Furious at this Brooks Newmark story. That is not journalism, that's entrapment. Just a disgusting and unnecessary attempt to hurt people
— Darling (@__Darling_) September 28, 2014

A male journo sent Brooks Newmark explicit pics of who knows who as part of a sting operation. Gutter stuff. Shouldn't be resigning issue.
— Owen Jones (@OwenJones84) September 28, 2014

And again I was swayed. I thought 'yes he's been a fool but so what. the newspaper was in the wrong even more'

But then my husband pointed out that we are in a country in a state of high alert for terrorism, we have parliament recalled for talks on war, and during all that we have MPs that think it's OK to send pictures of their John Thomas to female researchers on twitter because they believe on the strength of a few tweets that the woman is who she says she is.

@Nickking who sets up a fake profile & puts months of work into trying to see some ministerial cock? That's what I find staggering.
— Andy Smyth (@antisyzygy) September 28, 2014

Because a Minister needs to be more savvy. If a journalist can take the time to set up an account and create a false persona online just to get a willy picture, then what would others do to get things they need? Using a cock shot as blackmail would be a beginning but leading to what? secrets shared, information accidentally given or even given deliberately assuming that this new twitter friend was a researcher in the House of Commons so she must have clearance...it's all ok right? Because people online don't lie do they?!

So for me after all the outrage at the Sunday Mirror, and the laughter at Brooks Newmark's paisley pyjamas, after all the moral outrage on behalf of his family, I'm left thinking that the biggest question is why we allow MPs onto social media with so little training, they do not seem to understand the basic lesson that I teach my 14 year old.

"On the internet, nobody knows you are a dog"

Peter Steiner's cartoon, as published in The New Yorker

It seems to me that the government needs to ensure that MPs and all who work for the government and use social media need some proper security training. And that is the issue this has revealed.

What a tangled web we weave

When first we practice to deceive...

So they say, and based on one experience I had online it seems to be true.

Way back in the olden days, before twitter, message boards were very popular. I think some still are.

I was a member of a popular board for parents. Both mums and dads chatted about kids, life, jobs, all sorts of things. Some of us flirted a bit, nothing serious, we were mostly all in relationships. Some of us made friends and exchanged Christmas cards, talked on the phone, chatted via email that sort of thing. And about 20 of us became really close. All women and one dad.

When a few of us were banned from the message board site (don't ask, that's a WHOLE other story) we started our own board.

The dad on the board was in his 30s. He had a young wife and a young daughter when he first joined. Later his wife got pregnant again and they had another girl. He was really nice, worked in the city doing shares or something, was good at financial advice. Often discussed schooling, wanted advice on his daughters, that sort of thing. His wife wasn't keen on him sharing things online, so he used a pseudonym ("Bis") , for himself and "fake" names for all his family, much like I do now, back then I shared my real name, and my families real names and location.

He was witty and clever, very chatty, often flirty, but never stepped over the line. He was nice, and fun. It was good to have a dad's perspective on things.

We were all friends on the new board, still talking about family life over a year later.

Then one of the ladies on the board broke up with her husband. It was very sad and a tough time for her, we all rallied round (digitally speaking) with advice and support.

Soon after that, Bis needed to travel on business and suggested he meet her as he would be in her state. She agreed, they met and had lunch.

But she was worried, she told us he appeared a lot younger than he had claimed, and he was a lot more flirty than he was online. But the meal passed without major incident and they said goodbye still friendly.

When he returned home after his trip he told us how he'd stumbled on a family crisis. His wife was having an affair and was planning to leave. He was devastated. She would be taking the children and he didn't know what to do. He hoped maybe he could stay with one of us, specifically the lady he'd met as they'd got on so well .....

None of us knew what to say, so many friends with breakups was upsetting, we were sad for everyone, but the lady he'd met told us privately that she was uneasy about meeting him again.

Bis continued to tell us about what was going on but things sounded like they were happening so fast, it was all starting to sound 'odd'.

Bis told us how much he'd always liked the lady he'd met and that now he wanted to ask her out, but he'd told some lies. We assumed maybe his wife didn't know about his online life, or maybe he'd invented her 'affair' to put himself in a good light, but the "affair" his wife had wasn't the lie...

He told us he needed to come clean. It seemed that a tangled web was so tangled by now that even Bis realised, despite keeping copious notes about what he'd said in the past, the ages of his girls, etc etc he couldn't continue.

It was ALL a lie. He was not 30. He was not married. There were no children. He didn't work in the city. There was no business trip. He didn't even have a girlfriend.

He was a teenager, living at home, he worked at a corner store. He had joined the message boards when his then girlfriend had aborted his baby when he had wanted to keep it and marry her, they had split up. He had wanted to pretend he was going to be a dad, he had been so upset he had invented his perfect family, and the lie had grown and grown.

He had grown to like people online. But he couldn't stop the lie. It was too big, it had a life of its own. He had tried to 'remove' his family only when he wanted to ask the woman out...

Everyone on the message board was shocked. They immediately banned him. The woman he met was freaked out and wouldn't speak to him ever again.

I kept on touch online for a while as did my friend Mimi (she's real, I've been to california and met her) but it was odd, not knowing what, if anything was real.

Sometimes I think of him and wonder what he's doing now. I hope he's ok. The story was strange and sad. But it makes me behave differently online now.

There is an old New Yorker cartoon where two dogs are using a PC, one is saying to the other "on the internet, no one knows you are a dog" it's true. None of us know who the others are.

Take care out there.

Have you been fooled online? How much do you lie? 

Pop over to my Facebook page and comment  there, or come for a chat on twitter. 

Dearest Beloved

I get some really lovely emails from some really lovely generous people sometimes, (every day) which just proves to me the Internet is full of fantastic and lovely people. I thought you should share in the joy these emails bring, so here are a couple from today's offering