14.10.14

Chore Wars

I wasn't going to talk about it, I turned down a company who asked me to talk about women doing the lions share of the housework. I saw posts on twitter about it, I read blog posts about it, but I stayed strong. I didn't blog about it. And then today, finally, a radio ad for Woman's Hour (a show I've appeared on and yet loathe) broke me. So here I am.

Chore Wars

How ridiculous. Are women really so feeble we can't ask a bloke to help if we need to? Are men really so lazy and feckless they just lay around watching footie and drinking beer from the can, unless poked by a feisty female?

I don't think so. I think we are grown ups. I think that mothers raise sons and we raise them to be equals in a relationship, just as we raise our girls. I hope that mothers of boys (I only have a daughter) teach them to cook, clean, wash up, split the laundry into lights and darks, and how to handle babies just as I teach my daughter.

I hope other mothers of daughters are teaching their girls how to light real fires, check their oil and antifreeze levels (ooh must take car to garage - don't let me forget) I hope they are learning to change a wheel, use power tools and mow lawns with stripes.

I think the constant bashing of men as lazy hurts us all and the frequent martyr language of the long suffering mum at home does the same. Are you a couple? Then you are a partnership. You split the chores and housework as best suits you, as a partnership. Your gender is irrelevant. You are a team. Pull together, face the world, win.

In my house there is a full time worker and a stay at home partner who does the majority of the housework and looks after DD. This has worked for us as a family for 14 years.

The fact that it's me that works and DH that knows how the washing machine works, is neither here nor there.